A Little Bit of Both

It's Sunday. Isabelle is upstairs pretending to nap and Henry is out with Nick. I've been given a few moments of quiet reflection so I'm writing. As a mom of two young people, I'm feeling really thankful with a side note of burnout. The last few weekends have been full of really amazing and funny happenings, but have also left me feeling at wit ends with managing the two very different personalities of my kids. Henry is so thoughtful and kind, but has a temper that makes me want to cry. Isabelle is absolutely hilarious and sweet, but is so three and stubborn that I consider going back to work at least once a day. A girlfriend of mine just sent me an article from huff post about three year olds. Here's a quote: "After dealing with two 3-year-olds in my house, I can tell you from experience that they are undeniably the hardest humans on the face of the planet to negotiate with. The reason? They don't give a f*ck!" True story. It's intense. A six year old and a three year old make for a very busy home full of a lot of smiles. And teeth grinding. Here are a few examples of both extremes. 

1. One of my dearest friends took me out to dinner last Friday for my birthday. I went to give the kids a kiss goodbye and Henry was happy to oblige. Isabelle, however, said to me, "I'm not going to tell you goodbye. And, I'm not gonna kiss you." So, I left. Whatever. The next morning she climbed in bed with me to snuggle. As she twirled my hair she said, "I love you mommy." These two pictures illustrate what I'm describing here.

2. "Do you wanna know what orphans look like? Chicken wings." -Isabelle, while riding in the backseat just thinking about life and the movie Annie. 

3. "Do you know that 34 minutes is equal to 2,040 seconds?" -Henry, while riding in the backseat just thinking about math.

4. On Saturday night we went out to dinner as a fam. We had a bit of a wait for our table so we went into a nearby store to look around. I sort of got carried away by the merchandise and forgot anyone was with me. When I came to, I found Isabelle with 9 bracelets on, carrying a sparkle purse and I saw Henry and Nick at the jewelry counter. They were clearly up to something so I focused on freeing Isabelle of the merch and getting back to the restaurant. Once seated at our table, Henry presented me with a box and inside was the sweetest necklace. He said, "See, there are two hearts. One is you and one is me. The counter lady said it was a top seller." Nick said it was all Henry's idea and that he had found him at the counter alone, trying to find me the right necklace.

5. This morning during breakfast Isabelle asked me to cut up her cinnamon role so I went to the kitchen to get a knife. When I returned Tammi and Marvin were on so I used the butter knife as a microphone and lip synced "You're All I Need to Get By." Both kids stared at me with crazy looks and Henry said, "that was pretty weird mom." Isabelle said, "please stop that." At least she said please. 

6. This morning we also went to church for Sunday school and service. We went to the later service because Henry's class was "passing the peace" at the 11:00 service. This would have been great, but the church decided to hold service, perform the youth spring musical, baptize a baby, and then pass the peace. Too much! During the baptism the pastor invited all kids to come forward to sit on the alter. This was a great opportunity to get up and move, thank goodness. But, the baptism went super long too and Isabelle started creeping up in an army crawl fashion toward the family and baptism water thing. I went to grab her and she told me rather loudly, "Stop! I'm just being a wolf snake!" In all fairness, the service was just too long for any kid or adult. And, the passing of the peace? Such an after thought and to me, a fail. Not worth the 90! minutes we were in church. We went out for tacos afterward though so it's cool. 

As I sit here writing, I think about the above examples and how much they each made me laugh or cry or explode with frustration. When you choose to become a parent it's not just fun and games nor is it all stress and burnout. There's a mix of both and that's why it continues to be rewarding and difficult. And, why finding a balance is near impossible. From day to day you don't know what you'll get, which personality will show up for breakfast, and whether you will have a good day or a bad day. But, this is pretty certain: You'll have a day. And, at the end of it, good or bad, you will have been kissed, hugged, slapped, kicked, sassed, been told you are the best and the worst, counted down the seconds until bedtime, and probably have experienced some amount of joy and peace in your parenting. 

-maggie